Home > Rants > Cost Cutting

Cost Cutting

What Does It Really Mean?

Many people wonder why large companies try to shave pennies off their costs. Especially when the product sells in the multi thousand dollar range. Most people don't grasp the reasoning behind it.  I mean it's obvious that cost cutting saves money but in the grand scheme of things, most people tend to think it incredulous that a company, any company would be concerned over saving $6.83 on a set of tuners for a $4,500.00 list price guitar.

Let Me Explain It:

Lets say for example, a company shaves a meager $6.83 off the cost of building their guitar. If they can do this in a way that doesn't greatly effect the overall quality, Great! But more often than not this is how quality slips slowly down the toilet.

OK Here We Go!

  • PBS company has just reduced their cost per guitar by $6.83
  • PBS company builds 141 guitars a day that equals a daily savings $963.00
  • PBS company is open for business 275 days a year
  • PBS company has saved a whopping $264,833.25

Two hundred sixty four thousand dollars is more than a quarter of a million dollars. That money goes straight to the bottom line. In other words it's pure profit savings! Pure Profit Savings is the best kind of profit because on most profit you have to pay taxes, Pure Profit Savings is non taxable.

Now, Imagine the difference between a $64.00 tremolo system and an $11.00 stop tailpiece system. If you use the same numbers the saving would be approaching 3 million dollars.

Have I made my point?

Ed Roman, 01/15/99

Check Out The Quicksilver Guitars

 Why Guitars are better than Men: 

Guitars don't snore.

Guitars never wake you up in the middle of the night, for any reason.

Guitars never try to show you off to their friends.

Guitars don't come home drunk after a night out with the other Guitars.

You don't have to praise a Guitar after playing it.

Guitars don't have to prove anything.

Guitars don't try to change you once you've bought them.

Second-hand Guitars don't go to see previous owners when you're out of town.

Guitars don't have egos.

You don't have to continually assure your Guitar that its string length is just right.

Your Guitar will never earn more than you do for the same job just because it's a Guitar.

Your Guitar never spends a "night out with the Guitars" and comes home with a strange rash on its fretboard.      

 Why guitars are better than women:

You can share your Guitar with your friends.

Guitars don't care how many other Guitars you've played

Guitars don't care if you look at other Guitars.

Guitars don't care if you buy Guitar magazines.

Your Guitar doesn't care if you never listen to it.

Your Guitar won't care if you leave up the toilet seat.

Your parents won't remain in touch with your old Guitar after you dump it.

Guitars don't insult you if you're a bad player.

Your Guitar never wants a night out with the other Guitars.

You can play your Guitar the first time you meet it, without having to take it to dinner, see a movie, or meet its mother.

What's worse than telling jokes about guitarists?
Laughing at 'em.

What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?
He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it.

What do a vacuum cleaner and an electric guitar have in common.
Both suck when you plug them in.

How do you know when the stage is level?
The drummer is drooling out of both sides of his mouth.

What's the difference between a Lead Guitarist and the PLO?
You can negotiate with the PLO.

Did you hear about the guitarist who was in tune?
Neither have I.

How do you make a guitarist's eyes light up?
Shine a flashlight in his ear.

Why are so many guitarists jokes one liners?
So the rest of the band can understand them.

What's the difference between a guitar player and a bag of garbage?
The garbage gets taken out at least once a week.

 THINGS YOU'LL NEVER HEAR ON A MUSICIAN'S TOUR BUS...

Shouldn't we go back for the drummer?
Oh no you don't! It's my turn to clean the bathroom.
Checkmate!
Go roll 'em down the aisle all you want. They're only cymbals.
So, I just walked her home, kissed her goodnight, and came back to the bus.
No, the monitor mix was perfect. I just screwed up.
Twenty percent? Our manager should get at least 30 percent!!
Why is there porno in the VCR?
Can you believe all the money we're getting?
Boy, I can't wait till we get to Omaha!
No thanks, I don't want another beer.
Ladies, I need to see some proof of age please.

Time Magazine quotes Milli Vanilli "singer" Rob Pilatus as saying, "Musically, we're more talented than any Bob Dylan or Paul McCartney. Mick Jagger can't produce a sound. I'm the new Elvis." (2-27-1990)

Worst Joke I Ever Heard

Bob Hill and his new wife, Betty, are vacationing in Europe; as it happens, in Transylvania. They're driving a rental car along a rather deserted highway. It's late, and raining very hard. Bob can barely see 10 feet in front of the car. Suddenly the car skids out of control! Bob attempts to control the car, but to no avail. The car swerves and smashes into a tree.

Moments later, Bob shakes his head to clear the fog. Dazed, he looks over at the passenger seat and sees his new wife unconscious, with her head bleeding. Despite the rain and unfamiliar countryside, Bob knows he has to carry her to the nearest phone. Bob carefully picks his wife up and begins trudging down the road. After a short while, he sees a light.

He heads towards the light, which is coming from an old, large house. He approaches the door and knocks. A minute passes. A small, hunched man opens the door. Bob immediately blurts, "Hello, my name is Bob Hill, and this is my wife, Betty. We've been in a terrible accident, and my wife has been seriously hurt. Can I please use your phone??"

"I'm sorry," replies the hunchback, "but we don't have a phone. My master is a doctor. Come in and I will get him."

Bob brings his wife in. An elegant man comes down the stairs. "I'm afraid my assistant may have misled you. I am not a medical doctor. I am a scientist. However, it is many miles to the nearest clinic, and I have had basic medical training. I will see what I can do. Igor, bring them down to the laboratory."

With that, Igor picks up Betty and carries her downstairs, with Bob following closely. Igor places Betty on a table in the lab. Bob collapses from exhaustion and his own injuries; so Igor places Bob on an adjoining table. After a brief examination, Igor's master looks worried. "Things are serious, Igor. Prepare a transfusion."

Igor and his master work feverishly, but to no avail. Bob and Betty are no more. The Hills' deaths upsets Igor's master greatly. Wearily, he climbs the steps to his conservatory, which houses his pipe organ. For it is here that he has always found solace. He begins to play, and a stirring, haunting melody fills the house.

Meanwhile, Igor is still in the lab tidying up. As the music fills the lab, his eyes catch movement. He notices the fingers on Betty's hand twitch. Stunned, he watches as Bob's arm begins to rise! He is further amazed as Betty sits straight up!

Unable to contain himself, he dashes up the stairs to the conservatory. He bursts in and shouts to his master:

You sure you want to know?

 O.K. You asked for it......

"Master, Master!... The Hills are alive with the sound of music!"
 

If you made it this far Click Here